The changes in my family and school situations caused me to withdraw into the magical land of books. I may have had low self esteem and poor grades but I was one well read little girl.
I didn't like my new school because the kids thought I was stupid and I was wildly unpopular. So I let Food comfort me.
By the time I was twelve years old I'd learned to loathe my body. I can remember seeing my self in the school bus mirror and hating everything about my reflection. I thought my weight was the reason no one liked me.
Around this time my parents offered to send me to a Great Watcher's weight loss camp. Wow, I was so excited. This would be the fix I needed. Everyone would love me when I got back.
I went to camp and made alot of friends, it wasn't all bad. But unfortunately I was left alone with a female counselor who repeatedly made advances on me and another camper. I was on the edge of 13 about to become a woman and my first lesson was that sex was dangerous. I was a sexual person and I didn't want to be if it ment creepy, unwanted advances. For my own safety I could not allow myself to be sexual. The more I lost weight the more sexual I became and the more frightening it was for me.
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